Random

is almost 12am right now.
and i am still blogging here
sign!
tomorrow is my IF midterm
No motivation to study at all
Don't really know what the notes talking about
Don't know what am i struggling now
I just left around two chapter
omg!
please give me some motivation
i just want to finish off

Epic Failed

just now when i was in the class.
i received a message where its makes me no mood to continue on
I forced myself not to tear it out
i tried so hard to focus on class
but i failed

My tears finally can out when i reached home
Crying like a child non-stop
i am just so epic fail!
Suddenly feel like not going home this week
Don't ever ever
have a feeling that get abandon
i thought will treat back the same thing to me
I really don't know who should I talk to
i don't know where should i express out
i am fucking so damn right now.
I don't know what's going on
please..... just leave alone
i need to be more independent
more understandable
more mature
I need to be more balance

Why i can such a bad guy??
A thousand reason for not to be like that
why i still acting like this??
Why am i so selfish?
Why?
oh my god
please stop my tears
feel like wanna go a place that can make my mind clear.

     

讨厌这样的自己

不能再意气用事
不能再要求什么
不能再长不大了
不能再哭了
我真的不能再这样下去了，
其实比起不好意识
伤心更不好受

咳！

有的时候是我太过偏激嘛？
还是自己在执着些什么？
我应该
忍着，
就不用面对各种问题
忍着，
就不会有今天的尴尬
不知道自己执着些什么
到会头是自己辛苦
我承认我承受不起被别人的批评

咳，
也许不应该太在乎别人心中的自己
也在乎不了太多！

Today is not my day

Time pass too fast
Time is wait for no man
Is already middle of my this semester
going to begin my assignment, midterm and presentation weeks
tons of task waiting me to touch them
but i just don't feel like do anything
i hate those tasks
All the assignment please just leave my alone
killing me so damn well
This is my life

Today is not my day
And i don't think will be have a better day tomorrow
I am average negative person

一个人的不习惯

新学期了
一个人的日子开始了
看到自己的学院
看到那些教室
看到那些学生
那么陌生
很陌生
好像从没来过这个地方
陌生的感觉原来是那么的可怕

回到家，
同样的桌子
同样的两张床
还是一样那么陌生

对着电脑
整个房间很安静
听着风扇的声音
那个声音一样那么陌生

想家了啊！
一年的时间其实很长
长到足够的时间来改掉我那些的不习惯

不哭

忍着不哭!
真的不能哭
为什么又是我?
为什么我是永远的失败者!
是我不够努力吗?
还是我无论怎么努力还是一样!
真的和很想放弃
我真的不想让任何人失望的
真心不想！
真的像想死的感觉！
其实我不是该习惯这感觉吗
忍着不哭! 真的很幸苦,很幸苦!